Musiq has dissapointed me

to the fullest extent. Quite literally, Musiq Soulchild has lost all respect from me. He just came out with this new song called "Radio". Well I don't know if it just came out but this is the first time I'm hearing of it. I have to say that the Musiq Soulchild that was once a soulful voice, that reached into the hearts of many, with classics like "Love", and "Girl Next Door", no longer exists. He has chosen to conform like so many other artists have in this industry. I didn't expect this from him at all. I'd expect this from somebody like Ray-J or somebody with no musical depth similar to him. Not Musiq...no! But sadly he has fallen to this level. I have to be honest; I'm disgusted with this "new image" that Musiq has decided to portray. Yeesh! I mean what does his name stand for? Last time I checked it wasn't Musiq HIPHOPchild...ugh! He's the epitome of a sellout. Enough said.

music is withering,
[Cee].

destiny and its confusing path,

has been riddling me for the past year. I've been getting signs from everywhere that my fate with this (let's call him #1) #1 is meant but there are other confusing signs that say otherwise. I've had dreams of #1 telling me that in the end of it all, he'll be mine. But then again, they say your dreams are only a vision of whats going on in your subconscious mind. This could possibly be true; could it be that my wants and desires of being with #1 are subconsciously illustrated and come out through my dreams? Then this means none of the dreams are even irrelevant. However the picture above is kind of a different sign. That right there is my finger. In the middle of my finger (in case you can't tell) is a heart-shaped wart. LOL, yes a wart....but you know how I got that wart? The story goes a little something like this:

One night #1 had a birthday party. Since his parents let him stay up until whenever, this party was from 8 pm until 3 am. Knowing that my parents wouldn't let me out at this time of night, I bravely snuck out the house borrowing my mother's car. Now keep in mind that these are 2 factors against me already; borrowing my mother's car without permission (1) and sneaking out the house (2). As I couldn't leave until about 10 because I was rehearsing for a show that night, I picked up some friends of mine (got lost on the way there [1 more factor] and didn't arrive at the party until about 12. I thought to myself, "oh it won't matter cuz the real party won't start until 12 anyways"... WRONG!! Much to my surprise, authorities made everybody leave because we had a city curfew being that we were under 18. So I got to listen to 2 songs and was forced out of the building. Would you look at that!!! 2 more horrible factors to add to my night; i wasted $20 on gas (1) and $10 to get into the party (2) just to have to leave 15 minutes later. WOW!
It's not even over yet...we got to the car and IT WOULDN'T START! O M G...it took me 20 mins trying to turn the key in the ignition to get it started. The car does this all the time but it never took me that long to make it start. I was panicking thinking I wasn't going to get my friends home in time OR WORST; I was going to have to call somebody for help which would ultimately reveal that I wasn't supposed to be out at all. Mann...(2 more factors). So when we add this all up I had 7 factors looking down on me telling me this whole night shouldn't have happened.
However, when I woke up in the morning...this wart was on my index finger. A perfect heart. What could this mean? After going through all that for this #1, I had to think that this was a sign. After telling numerous individuals about my night and the outcome after it all, my collective response was "It's Fate!". I still don't know...what do you think???

the beach,

this sunday was soooo fun! so Aaron and Ashley was supposed to join us but somebody (that buster Aaron) didn't call somebody else (me) and they never showed up. Nonetheless, we (Phillip, Karl, Janea, and myself) all had fun! An enjoyable series of events:

• scarfed down some Weinerschnitzel [while everybody was clowning that 99 cent chili fry burrito and then ended up buyin' it cuz it was bomb...uhm yea shetup]
  
• spent 20 minutes looking for FREE parking
  
• saw our FIRST black-on-black fully bonified nigga-on-nigga gay couple
  
• poplocked in the middle of the circle with some old clown that juss got out of jail (lmao)
  
• tried to escape some bum who "supposedly" has a rich best friend and thinks that Phillip was a "beautiful man"
  
• danced in the middle of the circle with some white people who look like they were on X with a man on stilts who looked like he was calling for some deranged spirits [yeesh!]
  
• tried to beat the waves before they got our jeans wet [did not succeed]
  
• laughed the whole way home!

So what a day! I was bumbed my best friend went to Miami/New York, Ant boned out on me and those kiddos i mentioned earlier in the blog didn't come either. But we still had a blast! haha. Yes a blast. Next time you should join...I promise you'll have a blast too!

satisfied,

[Cee].

studying and,

school is pretty damn boring. So I'm now officially a senior [09' whew whew!] and I still don't quite know where I want to go in life as far as school concerns me. To tell you the honest truth, I had plans to attend NYU but I recently got a reality check. My grades and extra cirriculars aren't good enough for NYU. So now, I really don't know where to go. I have an extreme desire to attend The Academy of the Dramatic ARts. However I have been discouraged to attend these type of schools beccause "they won't provide me with the educational foundation I need". Quite frankly, I have enough. All I need is vocation because that's all I want to do in life. And it will happen. There's no other option ( but we'll get into that later). Of course I'm not dumb enough NOT to have a plan B. But I'm ambitious enough to take the chance! Ugh, I hate school. I wish to be done and do what I wanna do for the rest of my life.

the essence of,

[Cee]; what an enriching experience. You wanna know about this one? All I can tell you for now is that you should probably stay tuned into those future blogs...They'll definitely be interesting. So for now sianara, and for later...hello world!


on today,
[Cee].